NYC is

LIVE yet DEAD

Populated yet lonely

Rich yet poor

Loud yet quiet

Beautiful yet dirty

Fascinating yet boring

Is it?

Uncertainty of my FUTURE

I am sicking tired of the uncertainty of my future.

As hard as I try to make things possible and brighter, the fear of loosing control over my life always brings dark cloud over my head.

My mind is filled with many questions: how long can I wait? How long do I have to endure? Why me? What can I do? What would be the consequences? What if...? Would I regret? WHAT FOR?

yet, there's no answer.

There will be no answer until I make the decisions and move forward with whatever I have.

Why can't I just run back to Korea and pretend like everything is FINE? Thus it is too much for me to handle...